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sexyseventhgrader:

it’s 2014 why do printers still sound like you’re sacrificing your first born child to the aztec gods

official-2014:

I was wearing my Gryffindor shirt while Christmas shopping and there was this cute guy in a Slytherin hat and we made eye contact and he looked me up and down and said “10 points to Gryffindor” and winked at me and normally I hate being hit on but damn boy that’s the way to do it

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dangergays:

My boyfriend broke up with me and my 80 year old, 5 foot tall, Indian grandmother told me that “there are lots of men…”

I thought she was then going to say “…in the sea” but she said “…they’re like flies” and made a disgusted face.

She hates flies.

some-awkward-loser:

aye-lemme-whisper-in-yo-ear:

dirtyalec:

maahamburger:

i just want boys to say cute things to me 

suck my dick

Cute Things

suck my dick in the rain

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bootipop:

I got one of those sleeping masks you put over your eyes to keep the light out of your eyes and i was like “haha I wonder what this looks like on” so i took it to the mirror and put it on and then I realized the flaw in my plan

moriarty:

when someone on your dash is nightblogging and its still daytime where you live
redemption357:

The Who destroying their instruments while John continues to play the bass.
  • Moffat: You should flirt with Clara
  • Capaldi: NO WAIT I have a better idea... Dinosaur.
  • Moffat: Wait wha-
  • Capaldi: The doctor should flirt-
  • Moffat: I don't-
  • Capaldi: WITH A DINOSAUR.
  • Moffat: Um
  • Capaldi: *whispers* dinosauuur.